So it's official...I just failed my first test in nursing school.  It was in my pediatric nursing class.  I'm actually taking it much better than I had expected.  The thought of failing a test earlier in my nursing career would have probably induced some vomiting, but now I'm actually almost okay with it.  I don't want to fail the class, but you know what?  I've made it this far without failing anything, and I'll count that as a success.  Don't get me wrong.  I don't EVER want to fail another nursing test again as long as I live, but if I had to fail one test, this would have been the one to fail.  It was a test on peds (which is a subject I very much dislike) and was during a week when we were covering very difficult material in a very short amount of time.  There were also some other factors involved which I won't go into here.  But yeah, I failed a test and I'm still alive.  I'm am (for now) still in school and still able to progress through the program, so I'm not going to beat myself up about it.  I will just try twice as hard on the next one.  And if I don't progress, I don't progress--and that is a bridge I will have to cross when I come to it.  Until then, happy studies, everyone...and don't get too down on yourself.  :)

Hello everyone!  It has been an incredibly long time since I've posted anything.  I've been doing a terrible job at vlogging since I feel that I have to be dressed up and have my hair looking nice.  I do not, however, have any good excuse for not sitting around in my sweatpants posting to this blog since I'm on the internet a good portion of the day anyway.  You have my most sincere apologies but absolutely no promise at all that I'll do any better in the future. :)

I'm writing today to let you know that I'm now in my 4th semester and am taking Mother/Baby.  This 4th semester is split into two halves with the first half covering Mother/Baby and the second half covering peds and geriatrics (which begins in mid-October).  I'm coming to the end of my time learning about birth and infant care, but I still have one week left of clinicals on the postpartum unit at the hospital.  During my clinical experience so far this semester I have seen circumcisions, changed poopy diapers, massaged funduses (fundi?), and witnessed both a vaginal delivery and a c-section.  If I were to say which birth I preferred to watch, it was probably the vaginal as I could actually participate by holding the client's leg or helping clean up the patient after delivery.  During the c-section, I just felt I was in the way and was paranoid about getting to close to the sterile field to really enjoy myself.  I did get to see a uterus, ovaries, and fallopian tubes IRL so that was super fun (I also got to see a cervix in real life during a speculum exam!  So cool!). :)  It all looks a little different than in the pictures and when they are sewing things up after the delivery, it all just looks like a big meaty mess.

Speaking of meaty messes, I also had the opportunity to put in a straight cath for my post c-section patient who hadn't urinated 3 hrs after her Foley was discontinued.  That was an interesting experience because not only was it my first catheterization...it was the first time I had seen what pregnancy (not even a vaginal delivery) does to a woman's genitals.  Despite the fact that all of her private parts were unaffected due to her c-section, it still looked angry and swollen and the urethra was hard to find.  It took a while, but with some coaching from my instructor and the amazing patience of the mom, I was able to successfully finish the procedure.  

The last and most fun thing we've done at clinicals is a little game I like to call "Pass the Baby."  We play this in the nursery when we are having our post conference and discussing paperwork with our instructor.  If a baby is placed in the nursery, we tend to pick it up and coo at it for several minutes before another classmate begs to hold it.  We all enjoy the warm-fuzzies it gives us (thanks to that fantastic rush of oxytocin) and it helps us unwind from the busy day.  It also seems to calm down the baby as they seem to get fussy after being left in their bassinet for a while.  This has been my first real experience around newborns, and I'm finding that I like them much more than I thought I would at the beginning of this class.  I still don't think that L&D and Mother/Baby are a good fit for me, but it is interesting to see how much your opinion of a certain unit changes after staying there for a while.

In my next post, I will try to catch you guys up on what I've been doing lo these many months so I won't feel as guilty for neglecting this account.  Hope everyone is doing well!  Happy studying!

 Okay...so I'm officially overwhelmed.  I just came home from my microbiology class, and it's 96 degrees outside.  Luckily, the air conditioner in my apartment is finally fixed so it is not 96 degrees *inside,* but it smells a little funny...probably from whatever bacteria is growing on my unwashed plates in the kitchen sink.  I suppose I'm hoping the dish fairy will come and clean them for me because I know I don't have time.  I spent 5 hours working on one assignment for my clinicals today, and I have another assignment and a half to finish this evening that will probably take me even longer.  I'm not even concerning myself with the gigantic amount of medical jargon I'm suppose to have memorized before tomorrow morning's Med Term exam.  Or the microbiology test or A+P lab practical I'm supposed to study for for next week.  Dishes are a bit lower down the list than even those things.

 This morning I had my third clinical experience, my last day on the post-surgical unit.  It was my second day charting in the medical record, and while I was a little more comfortable with it today, I hate feeling like I don't know what I'm doing.  I hate constantly having to ask for help from people who are incredibly busy.  I also hate feeling like I'm just going through the motions with my patient to make sure I have something to document later.  I had the sweetest old lady today, but I felt like half of our conversation was just me trying to get all the information for my nursing tool.  Luckily, she was talkative and gave me all the information that I needed.  Still, I found myself forgetting to ask things and having to come back to them in awkwardly unrelated ways during other conversations.

Overall, I suppose my clinical experience wasn't bad today.  I think I managed to get all of the information I needed and squeezed all of the tasks I needed to complete into the 6 hours I was there.  It seemed so much shorter than that.  I have no idea how real nurses manage so many patients.  Granted, we are currently doing both nurse aide and RN work, but we only have one patient to care for.  It should be so simple.  But I'm already wanting to pull my hair out.  I guess I should quit whining and finish my nursing tool and start my careplan as both are due at noon tomorrow.  I hope everyone is enjoying their program so far!  If you feel like screaming, just shut yourself in the car and let it out.  It might make you feel better.  If you are completely overwhelmed, as I seem to be today, just cry into your pillow and know that everyone goes through this whether they admit it or not.  Don't let the bad times and negative feelings keep you from achieving your dream...even when quitting seems like a much easier road.

As Randy Pausch said in his book The Last Lecture, "Brick walls aren't there to keep us out.  They are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something."

 It has been a while since my last real update.  School is going well enough so far.  I've been going to class for a week now, and I haven't had a complete nervous breakdown (although I have gotten quite panicky some evenings).  I'm still trying to decide if most of what the older students (and even some instructors) are saying about the test difficulty in my nursing class is accurate.  They are all warning us that we probably won't do well on the first exam and should learn from it to adapt for the next test.  It may just be to scare us into being prepared...or we may actually all do terribly on it.  I'm not really sure, but I suppose it doesn't hurt to prepare for the worst.

The frustration that most of us are experiencing is the fact that we don't know HOW to prepare.  Our first guided study session is tomorrow morning, and I'm *really* looking forward to it.  I'm hoping it will be "guided" in the direction of the test material (it wouldn't be a very good study session if it wasn't, I suppose) because at the moment, we are all completely lost on what we should focus on.  Should we focus on the main textbook?  I've heard other students say that it's more for background information than study material for the test.  Should we study our little Nursing Process guide book?  It doesn't have a lot of information, but we've been told by former to students to read it cover to cover before class starts.  Should we try using NCLEX review books to get a feel for the style of question that will be asked?  We've been told by many, including instructors that throughout our nursing program, we will be tested in a way that will make the NCLEX seem easier (or at least give us a much higher pass rate).

I'm terrified of how I'll do on the first exam.  The more people tell us not to worry about doing poorly on it, the better I want to do.  Maybe that's the point?  Some sort of school-wide experiment on reverse psychology?  Thinking about it gives me a headache.  At the moment, I'm only doing the assigned reading in the main textbook and picking up all my other material from my Nursing Process book.  I may try to do some exercises in my NCLEX books (on chapters that don't involve specific medical knowledge or nursing procedures, like the legal and ethical chapter or the chapter on leadership) just to get some more experience with analysis and application style questions.

On top of this, we're all struggling to balance all of the other classes we're taking.  I'm currently enrolled in 17 hours, and while I'm not completely overwhelmed yet, I'm growing awfully close with things like skills check-offs, med math exams, and clinicals creeping around the corner.  Right now, I'm basically just learning how to prioritize (basically focusing on my nursing class and putting anything that isn't due immediately on the back burner).  

Anyway, this is more of a whine than a real post, but I needed a place to vent my frustrations.  I assume those of you who have been through the nursing program remember feeling this way and hopefully grew a bit more confident as time went by.  I can only hope that I'll be there one day, looking back and laughing at the little freshman who stressed so much over a silly test.

 I decided to make a vlog in case I don't have time (or energy) to sit down and type something long.  I'm embedding these first two videos, and I'll add more as I make them throughout the semester.

The first one:




The second one:


I'm heading off to bed now!  Goodnight, all!

Orientation began today.  I woke up at 6:30, drank some Ovaltine, and psyched myself up for my first day at a new school.  It was a really long day (8:00-4:15), but it was totally worth it for the Chic-fil-A lunch in the middle.  We received lots and lots of papers and folders and signed several forms, and we were able to meet many of the staff (we'll meet some of the faculty tomorrow).  The staff were amazing as were the student volunteers who were there to show us around and talk to us about their own experiences.  It was definitely an eye-opening experience.  I suppose it's no different than the horror stories I've seen from nursing students on YouTube, but it's still really scary when someone is telling you that this is what happens in YOUR program.  We were told about math tests that we MUST make a 100 on to stay in the program, about students with Master's degrees who have failed these first semester nursing exams, and about the students who (like me) rarely made lower than an A on anything, only to struggle to with their work here.

In a way, today was like the introduction to some new, extremely peppy boot camp I'll be attending for the next two years.  I guess that's pretty much accurate though.  

Today wasn't all scary.  It was actually a lot of fun.  We received our ID badges, parking decals, a t-shirt, a cool black tote with the schools name embroidered on it, our email addresses and passwords, all of our user names and passwords for various website we're allowed to access, several sheets detailing anything we'd ever need to know about every non-academic topic ever (where to park, how to use the library, what clubs are available, campus security, fitness programs, etc).  All of this plus yummy Chic-fil-A and the opportunity to make new friends.  

Today I met two girls who were in a situation similar to mine.  Both had four year degrees but were pursuing a future in nursing.  If you'd asked each of us 4 or 5 years ago what we'd be doing now, I seriously doubt that nursing school would have been on the list.  But I'm glad I'm here.  I think I've made the right decision, and I'm so excited to have actually been chosen by this school (not going to reveal the name because there are some scary, crazy people trolling the internet...).  It's apparently a pretty tough school to get into in part, I'm sure, to its small size and great reputation.  I believe the statistic they gave was accepting 36% of the students who applied which or a school that size meant they accepted 180 new students total.  I'm not sure if that includes pre-nursing and the associate's degree in science track, but my guess is that it does.  I believe about 40 of those students were accepted into the ADN program, so I feel very privileged to be one of them!

Tomorrow should be interesting.  I got from 8:30-5:30, and we'll be doing our ADN orientation (as opposed to the school-wide orientation today).  We're also going to be meeting with our new advisors and attending a convocation over at the hospital. 

Anyway, I should probably wrap up this novel and get on with my evening.  Thanks for reading, and I'll try to keep you updated this week!  

Good morning everyone!  It's been a crazy week.  At the end of it, everything I needed to turn in for school is turned in and almost everything I need for my apartment has been moved down there.  My essays are done and all of my books have been ordered.  All that's left is to enjoy my last week with my family and boyfriend before nursing consumes my life. :)   I've actually decided to join a group of friends to play D&D.  It'll be my first time, and I'm kind of excited about it.  It might be a nice distraction from my school work every few weekends.

I've already read in my Fundamentals of Nursing book through Chapter 4 (which doesn't seem like much, but there is an insane amount of reading in the first and fourth chapters).  I've mostly been learning about the history of nursing, the images and stereotypes associated with nurses, and the model used by nurses to make most of their patient-related decisions.  Apparently there are four components to the model--critical thinking, nursing knowledge, nursing process, and patient situation.  Each of these components has many smaller components.  Nursing knowledge, for instance consists of four different types of knowledge--theoretical knowledge (the information about things like anatomy, drug interactions, psychology, etc.), practical knowledge (knowing what to do and how to do it, such as nursing skills), personal knowledge (knowing your own strengths, weaknesses, and responses to certain situations), and ethical knowledge (the knowledge of what is right and wrong).

I've also been learning about the nursing process, the steps of which are easier to remember as ADPPIE (our P is split into two steps, for those of you who are looking at me funny).

Assessment
Diagnosis (nursing diagnosis, NOT medical diagnosis)
Planning outcomes
Planning interventions
Implementation
Evaluation

I'm not going to go over all the information I've learned so far, but it's all very interesting.  Nursing is turning out to be very different from my original impressions of it from watching others work.  I haven't learned anything new that has turned me off to it.  In fact, I'm growing more and more certain that I've made the right decision in pursuing this field.  

Anywho, I suppose I should wrap this blog up and get back to reading!  My goal is to get through Chapter 10 before my first day of class.  

 Wow...it's August already.  Hard to believe that school will be starting in just a few weeks.  I'm really excited about getting this show on the road and starting my classes, but at the same time, I'm really going to miss being home.  This summer has been so much fun, and I'll be sad to see it end.  For the next five semesters (and yes, that includes next summer), it'll be mostly work and very little play so I'm trying to enjoy what's left of my summer break.  I've been watching a lot of television (Big Bang Theory, IT Crowd, True Blood, among others), playing video games, and reading fun stuff lately.  It seems like I'm trying to cram everything I probably won't have time for into these last few weeks before school starts.  I've also been doing a lot of reading to prepare for the program.  

Almost all of my books have come in, and now I'm mostly reading in my Fundamentals of Nursing book, trying to absorb everything I can before the class starts.  I also should be working on my dosage calculations while I have time as well.  I feel like I could use a bit of extra work in that area.  I'm not too worried about my two biology classes (A&P and microbiology) this semester because I feel pretty confident in my biology experience.  I took several bio classes in college for fun and usually ended up with one of the higher grades in the class, mostly because it wasn't work for my major---just something I enjoyed.  I'm sure it'll take a lot of studying to do well, but I think studying bio might be a nice break from studying so much nursing material.

I really don't have much else to say tonight.  I finished my essays questions on The Last Lecture, passed my physical, drug screen, and immunization stuff, and now all I have to do is fax the results from my PPD test (TB skin test) and order my last few books.  I'm almost done!  It's so exciting.

Also, I may or may not start a nursing vlog on YouTube.  I can't really decide.  It'll probably depend on whether or not I think I look good on camera.  :P  I hope everyone is having a wonderful week!  And if you're heading off to nursing school this fall, best of luck! <3

 Well, our college's online bookstore opened today, and I was finally able to see the booklist for my classes this semester.  After going through everything with my mom, we decided to look at those same books on Amazon and most of them were considerably cheaper (although our online bookstore actually has a used book marketplace built in).  There are 16 books required for my first semester, and I purchased 13 of them brand-new on Amazon today to the tune of $931.99.   Two of the final three will be purchased from various Amazon sellers with used books that are considerably cheaper.  The third one is for an online Medical Terminology course, and I'm not entirely sure how to order it. I guess I'll just order it from the school bookstore because it is some sort of "WebTutor" thing that I have to sign up for.  I'll figure that out later.

So yeah, my parents were gracious enough to pay for everything, and I am now one step closer to my first semester in nursing school.  Only my immunizations, drug screening, and PPD are left.  I also have to mail a few forms in.  Otherwise, there is nothing to do but wait and study up on things I might need to know when classes start.  Oh, yes, and I will also have to move several large pieces of furniture down to my apartment in the next week or two with the help of my family and boyfriend.  Did I mention how awesome they all are?  They're awesome.

Well, I suppose that's all I had to say for today.  I'm probably going to go see Inception tomorrow!  Yay!  

Good evening, everyone!  It's about 1am here, but I just wanted to post a quick update to bring everyone up to speed on what's going on as I'm preparing for nursing school.  I have my physical for school tomorrow (today, technically) and I hope that goes well.  On Friday, our online bookstore opens, and I'll get to purchase my first semester nursing books (YAY!!!!).  And on the 29th, I get to do all my fun immunization and drug screen stuff.

Tonight, I've mostly be working on the essay questions that go along with my reading The Last Lecture.  I just wanted to let everyone know that The Last Lecture is definitely worth your time.  The chapters are really short, and they are filled with insightful and inspiring thoughts from the mind of Randy Pausch.  While I may not be quite as much of a "Type A" personality as Mr. Pausch, I can definitely get behind his theories on how to live your life.  He was a man who accomplished so much in a short amount of time, and he still managed to write a lecture that would inspire thousands and a book that would be on shelves in every bookstore, all during his last years of life.  If you've ever had trouble getting motivated, this guy will totally give you a kick in the pants. 

On a similar note, I have totally been inspired by a nursing vlogger by the YouTube username of NurseNacole.  I can't believe I hadn't come across her vlog sooner.  She has so many videos and they are all so helpful!  How could I have missed this?  Anyway, if you'd like to check out her channel, click here.  It's awesome to see someone so positive and upbeat about the nursing program, and anyone who has seen her videos knows that her optimism and motivation to be the best nurse she can be will take her far.

That's all I've got for tonight.  I guess I should be sleeping or something, but seriously...who does that?  I guess I need to get on a decent sleep schedule before classes start in August.